She knew that what she was about to do was not right throughout that entire drive there. Kathryn Walsh (Katie to her friends) knew deep down in her soul, even now after almost finishing this forty-five minute trip that this was just the wrong thing to do.
But, Kathryn was dead on the inside and she had to do something. The man she had married was gone. He had been gradually replaced by a cold cement block of a person over a span of four years. In the beginning, she would tingle at his touch. Their eyes would burn into each other with an unspoken need to please each other. They would often make love throughout the weekend, always satisfying each others requests. Those days were now long gone. Both of them were now merely strangers occupying the same house. Life had given them both just too many balls to juggle and their passion for each other became non-existent. Kathryn dreamed for that original man who tingled her in the beginning to return but, he never did. This “new guy” had accepted the comfort of his wife just breathing and in the same room, Kathryn wanted-needed more. Still, that didn’t justify what she was about to do tonight. A married woman should be patient and supportive through all of the rough spots and smooth sailings. At least, this is what Kathryn felt throughout most of her life. Even when her own parents separated when she was sixteen, Kathryn blamed her Mom. Now, she thinks back and regrets those actions. It could have been the overwhelming well of total loneliness that her Mom was stuck in that she just didn’t understand as a teenager. She understood it now, today. That constant place that only you can understand. The isolation you feel when no one comforts or listens to you, even when your partner is a few feet away. The constant thoughts of being anywhere else but in the skin of yourself that crept into Kathryn’s thoughts daily. A dark place of solitude was forced on her and she had to break out, at any possible cost.
The rain started to let up just as Kathryn’s car approached the hotel. Greg had told her it was remote and it looked clean. He was right on both counts she thought and pulled into the hotel’s entrance. She parked her car in one of the furthest spots away from the main office.
“Just in case, who know.. someone might see me here …at a hotel 35 miles away from my house” Kathryn thought with just a tinge of guilt starting to surface. She loved her husband on some level, she didn’t doubt that for a second. But, she needed to be wanted and complete again-period. That’s what she had to keep reiterating to herself.
Just then, a grey Honda accord pulled into the lot. Kathryn recognized it as Greg’s car. He had arrived, just like he said he would. The Accord pulled into a spot and stopped. Greg got out and smiled at her and Just like that, as she had felt years before Kathryn tingled again.
They both proceeded into the main office to check in for the night. The manager handed Greg the key to room one.
Thoughts of how wrong she was started again in Kathryn’s head. She also knew that she had never felt so broken and lost in her life. She wanted to be loved again for just one night. Her heart started to beat fast in romantic anticipation for the first time in years. To have this unexplainable feeling once again in her life, simply overshadowed all the possible consequences.
She smiled at Greg. He smiled back and opened the door for both of them to enter room one of “The Lonely Lantern” hotel.
August Writing Prompt-One lonely lantern-Day 7/31